my [head+throat+heart] hurt.

mentally, my head hurts. too many things to think about. my presentation tomorrow. courses that i need to facilitate the day after all through the coming wednesday. problems keep on coming, and i can't stop thinking about them. really troublesome. watching the news in our national television makes matters worse. i've had enough of the so-called yang berhormats fighting their heads off in the parliament. don't they have better things to do?

physically, my throat hurts too. i wonder why. haven't yelled at my students the past couple of weeks. sometimes it feels itchy too. i want my 'cap ibu dan anak'!! a.s.a.p!!

emotionally, my heart hurts. badly. due to some circumstances that i could not bring myself to write them up for public to read. just so you know that these past few days, Allah's been testing me. whether i can keep myself straight after dugaan demi dugaan given to me. now, i think i had enough of these few people that keep on messing with my head+heart. up to a point that i could not care less of what they do. they won't matter to me anymore.

come school holiday, a.s.a.p. i really need a break from all of this!

of being single and young(er).

is it a sin being a single? did i bring any harm to anyone just because i have not settled down? why do i get treated badly just because i'm not married? i've had enough of these sort of double standards already. since working, approximately 4 years ago, being single is like a death sentence to me (and a few friends). i have to attend courses that those who are married did not want to go, simply because they had problems with 'anak²'. and i have to go to meetings because those same people can't make it due to family problem and i have nothing to think about at home. my god!!!! don't us, single people, have our own problems too? it may not be about children or husband or in-laws, but a problem is a problem no matter how you put it. no one is to judge how great or simple a problem is if you're not the one facing it.

me being single is not a choice. this is what we i like to call fate. if i can just pick anyone to be wed, i would have done it years ago! who does not want to be married and start a family? everybody does. it's just that my 'time' is yet to arrive. and for that, i have to be 'punished' by doing stuff that mostly, are supposed to be done together as colleagues. i am trying my best to settle down, to have my own child(ren) et cetera. maybe i should try harder. but in the mean time, cant' they just give me a break, or better yet, treat me equally?

and is it my fault being born late? and start working when i'm only in my early 20s? me being young [if not the youngest..], is that a ticket for anyone not to show some respect to me? in this day and age, i believe in equality. in order to be respected by everyone, you have to respect others too. i have done my part, the best that i can [i.e respecting my superiors], but why can't they show me some respect too? when they give orders, can't they talk in a softer tone? and show some nice facial expression once in a while.. is that so hard to do? a simple and honest gesture means a lot to anyone.

i know we can't stay young forever. i am already 25 (ouch!!), and that's not young anymore. but being the junior in my workplace, plus a single one too, i don't think i get respected for being me. i maybe younger, but i work like everyone too. so don't i deserve a little bit of respect? can't older people respect their juniors?

these are some of the reasons why i really want to fly away from my workplace. even though it's the best compared to my friends', but i'm afraid i can't handle this kind of pressure anymore. i am, intentionally or not, being DISCRIMINATED just because i am (still) single and young(er).

or, to ease my pain, shall i just find a husband right away?
rotflol.

fin.

Out of reach, so far
I never had your heart
Out of reach, couldn't see
We were never meant to be

So much hurt, so much pain
Takes a while to regain what is lost inside
But I hope that in time
You'll be out of my mind
And I'll be over you

++++++

Today marks the end of everything I've felt all this while.

Fin.

I know I'm being obvious to those who know what I'm talking about..
But please, bear with me for now.
:|

...

AL-FATIHAH.

Got a call from Abah this morning.
Mok Long passed away last night.

Mok Long is my Grandma's eldest sister.
The last time I saw her was last Monday, when I visited her with my parents.
I had a strange feeling right before I went to Besut that day, that it would be my last time seeing her.. I just didn't know why I felt that way.
And looking at her condition that day, my heart ached.
She was no longer my Mok Long who always smile..who talks a lot.
She was just lying helplessly sick on the mattress without recognizing me or even my Ma.

Mok Long did recognize Abah, though.
Maybe because he was his own nephew.

If you read this, please sedekahkan al Fatihah to Allahyarham.
Thanks. :|
Wassalam~

Rumblings~

Assalamualaykum.

These days, I just don't feel like writing.. or blogging to be exact.

I rarely visit my friends' blogs too.

And even if I did, no notes were left in the comment box for them to read.. or to know that I 'stopped by' their blog.

This laziness.. has been part of myself lately.

Sigh~

What's with a new year, may I ask?

New resolutions? I don't have any. So does that make me a loser?

I don't 'torture' myself thinking of what I wanna achieve this particular year.

Failure to complete them, will eventually makes me feel like I'm a loser.

IMHO, things should be done gradually.. one thing at a time.

In my own pace.

And why am I sounding so negative, you ask?

Well, today I had to say good-bye to a very, very good collegue.

A teacher..a mentor..an advisor. He's phenomenal.

Moving to a new place, leaving us all behind.. well, that really changed my mood today.

Sigh~

2sen~

Assalamualaykum.

Funny.

How come..
'seeing' somebody you know for quite a long time..
makes you feel disgusted?

Hysterical.

Why..
do some people change..
and be like everybody else in order to be 'accepted'?

Peculiar.

Sometimes it's hard not to notice when things have changed..
not for the better, but vice-versa.

--> What am I babbling about? Sigh~ ..just letting out my 'uneasiness' over things that have changed around me..that's all.. ;|

freedom

Assalamualaykum.

These days, I mourn over the un-democratic situations in our country.
I feel like the freedom to state one's own opinion is blocked.
Citizens are being treated like rubbish.. with no mercy at all.
I wonder if this is the peaceful Malaysia we always boast about?

True, demonstration or street rally is not our 'budaya'.
Starting from the Batu Buruk incident to the BERSIH rally and the latest was the Hindraf demo.
But IMHO, the demonstrations would never turned out to be ugly if our police force did their part well.
After all they didn't mean any harm to the public at all.
If they weren't provoked with water canon and poison gas, I doubt they would act violently.
This is rather a case of something that was suposed to be so simple and easy to handle turned the other way around.

Truth be told, this entry is not my way of letting out my wrath against the government.
But watching the recent events,just made my heart ache.
There are definitely better ways to handle stuff but we preferred the hard and harsher way.
THE WORLD IS WATCHING US..
Sadly the 'friendly Malaysians' remains a tale now.

Media blackout?
Now that's another story to be wrapped up next time.

In the mean time I just need to ease my sadness upon what's happening in our beloved country.
And by that I mean another fruit pudding coming right up into my fridge!
Hehehehehehehe..

Wassalam.

Fate.

Assalamualaykum.

Last night, while chit-chatting with my sister I was shocked to hear from the news that Dr Sheikh Muszaphar's brother had passed away.
Pardon my ignorance, as I was not aware of the incident happened to his younger brother last week.
I was later informed by my sister of what happened resulting Allahyarham in coma for approximately 7 days.

The news got me thinking.. it silenced me for a while.
We as humans have definitely no idea of what to happen in the future.
Fate Allah has written clearly proved its truth.

MasyaAllah, I dare not think of how their mother [especially] must have felt.
As she was thinking about Dr Muszaphar's safety, suddenly a tragedy happened to her other son and causing death some more?
My deep condolences to all of Dr Sheikh Muszaphar's family..sincerely from the bottom of my heart.
I do hope that they'll be strong in order to overcome this trial.

Let's all recite Al-Fatihah to the deceased, Allahyarham Sheikh Mustafa Shukor Al-Masrie Sheikh Mustapha.
Semoga Allah mencucuri rahmat ke atas roh beliau dan ditempatkan di kalangan orang² beriman.
Amin.

Wassalam.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------
-29th October 2007
At approximately 10.00 a.m. today, I received another devastating news.
A colleague of mine who had just gave birth to a baby boy on 2 Syawal lost her only son this morning.
Allahyarham was only managed to be around for 15 days and all that while he was in the ICU in HUSM, not within his parents and family's embrace.
According to my other colleague, the baby died in his mother's arm.. :(
Again, Al-Fatihah to the baby.. :((

Decision.

Assalamualaykum.

To me, I'm a terrible decision maker.
I do things when time is almost running out.
People closest to me [especially my colleagues + boss], are well aware of this bad quality of mine.

On a different note, I'm getting better at making things worse these days.
But heck, I'm a different person now [I wish!!!]..
I am selfish, cruel and couldn't care less of what's happening around me.
As long as I'm happy, I'm happy.. [on the outside at least.]
Come to think of it, that's just another bad quality I've acquired, kan?
LOL

Getting back to the topic, I'm beginning to consider closing down this account @blogspot.
As much as I love my identity "fizhasan", I'm suffocating now.
I can't breathe here anymore.. and my mind is getting numb each day.
Perhaps I shouldn't reopen after the short hiatus status last time.

But still, I looooooooooove writing.
This passion I have for writing, no one can ever take it away.
Hence this blog is the place for me to let out my feelings.
[This is the downside of being single+available, ok people? Should I have a boyfriend, he might end up dead deaf by now listening to me whining.. huhu~]

However, it is still in my consideration.
I might close down this 'premise', but InsyaAllah I won't disappear in this blogosphere.
It is afterall, THE place where I got to know loads and loads of unforgettable, extraordinary and special people like:

KAK RUBY, ABE ID,KAK PB,PA'CHIK,DR SO'OD,ACHIK
and the list goes on..

They have all touched my heart in their own special kind of ways.
Up to a point that I felt like I've known them for ages.

Yes, I am terribly confused now.
But no, I don't think I felt a pang of guilt anymore.
I've just turned into the virtual version of "Cruella De Vil".

MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

Uncomfortable.

Assalamualaykum..



Sometimes I don't really understand LIFE.
Why should it be so difficult to understand?
Why must it bring sadness and confusion to me when all I need is PEACE?
Why, oh why??

These past few weeks I've been trying hard to be joyous.
To show my happy face to everyone..
I fought with my own emotion..trying to forget the sadness.
And the GUILT.

But in the end what good does that give me?
None. Nothing at all.

Perhaps I should be CRUEL this time around.
I should stop caring..
Because by showing that I care, I only make matters worse.
So ironic, don't you think?

*untitled

Assalamualaykum..

Seems like my love for writing prevents me from leaving this blog for long.
As for yours truly, writing gives me a sort of satisfaction.
It feels like I'm sharing my thoughts and stories with people closest to me.
So, I really hope you'll accept me blogging again.

I've been blaming myself for quite some time now.
And I can't really say that I've stopped doing that.
I still feel that way..

Achik..Kak pB..thanks A LOT for giving me full support through the times I consider "hard".
And pa'chik for always making me laugh..
It was hard for me, even though you guys might feel otherwise.
But life must go on, and I've to face the fact.
And accept his decision.. [though that only saddens me~]

Tomorrow InsyaAllah I'll be leaving for a short trip to North.
If only I could meet him, that would be better,wouldn't it? :(
But no,on the other hand, that'll make thing even worse that it already has.

Anyways, this song means SO MUCH to me.
Do cherish the song and its meaningful lyrics.
The first time I heard it, I cried.. whole heartedly.

*****

TAPI BUKAN AKU
Kerispatih

jangan lagi kau sesali keputusanku
kutak ingin kau semakin kan terluka
tak ingin ku paksakan cinta ini
meski tiada sanggup untuk kau terima

aku memang manusia paling berdosa
khianati rasa demi keinginan semu
lebih baik jangan mencinta
biarku dan semua hatiku
karena takkan pernah kau temui
cinta sejati

berakhirlah sudah semua kisah ini
dan jangan kau tangisi lagi
sekalipun aku takkan pernah mencoba kembali padamu
sejuta kata maaf terasa kan percuma
sebab rasa ku tlah mati untuk menyadarinya

semoga saja kan kau dapati
hati yg tulus mencintaimu
tapi bukan aku

*****

Wassalam~

Guilty!!

I feel so guilty..
So guilty I almost cried..
Felt so bad for being the curious me.
And even worse for knowing things I shouldn't have..
But the worst is to know that I've made you sad.

To that person..
[ you know who you are..]
I look up to you more than anyone else.
'Seeing' you making others happy and for all I know you're hurt inside.
Please find a spot in your heart to forgive me.
For being such a jerk and causing you discomfort.

I'm so sorry~

_______________________________________

fizzy..
like i said, its nobodys fault..
so no need to feel sad, guilty, apologize etc..
i have no reason to be mad..
:)

That's how I felt nonetheless.
I know you're not angry, but like 'anonymous' said, perhaps I've made you uncomfortable/uneasy with what happened.
Ermmm..thanks for leaving a note.
I do feel a little better. :|

Mixed!

Assalamualaykum..

Felt as if I've been leaving this blog for ages.. LOL
Well, truth be told, when blogs become partially blocked now, that affects my enthusiasm to write.
Not that there weren't any issues to be brought up and shared, actually it's the other way around.
But I wasn't just in the mood to blog.

Anyways, I have mixed feelings now.

Confused. Sad. Scared.Relieved.

There are just so many things happening at the same time.
Well, I better not think.. tomorrow insyaAllah I'm going home.
My nephews Hasif,Haziq,Nuqman and my one and only niece, Fatimah are surely the cure to all those feelings I'm having.
With them, I''ll only feel one thing :

H A P P Y

Kids... Chik is coming home tomorow!! :D

Wassalam~

Help!

Assalamualaykum..
During my lunch break yesterday [at the course], I checked my email and was a bit shocked to read a forwarded message from my TKC OGA.The message entitled "A brother is lost" caught my eyes and I went on reading it.
One of our OGs brother was missing since the mid of July and the family was dissappointed as the police had done almost nothing to find him.

He is 26 and mentally disabled, but that doesn't mean anyone should take this missing case very lightly.
According to Kak Leng (tkc8993) [who forwarded the message from the sister], the police even said that since the missing person is already 26, they did not prioritize the case.
Dang! Anyways, there was an article that came out in The Star last Friday.
You can read it here.


And this is the email from his sister Kak Mie (tkc8993) forwarded by Kak Leng:

Salam,
Hi all.
I know this is about to become like me airing my dirty laundry for the world to know, but I feel so desperate.I need to tell this to you girls.My brother Salhi has been ill with a psychiatric illness.Schizophrenia to be precise. He is 26 and he started having mental disturbance at 17 when he was in MCKK lagi.He was the genious of the family, the badut of the family and the best little brother anyone could ever wish for.
Past 10 years saw him deteriorating and my heart sgt sgt sebak when this time, I went to the hospital in KB to find him locked up in a cage, together with people I would not even look at, bcos they scare me. He had extra muscular twitches and gaunt facial expression. Memang tak nampak mcm my used to be little brother anymore. In between bites of coney dog ( dia suka A&W) he managed to tell me 'Nak sekolah balik Kak Mie please '. Repeatedly. I just held back tears.
We took him out, and he was stable during my wedding. Masa reception I kept him occupied with a camera so people don't feel obliged to make a petty talk with a 'weird' looking man. Everything was fine. On Friday the 13th, he left home saying he wanted to go for a walk. RM 3.50 in his pocket. He never came back. Duit tak ada, IC tak ada. We looked for him everywhere, satu Kelantan. No news.
He hasn't taken his medications for 2 weeks now, I tak tahulah how he is now.Mungkin kalau you all jalan2 kat KL nampak budak gila (I have to accept this now) talking to himself, kotor, kurus tak terurus, kejap cakap english kejap cakap kelantan, that's him. Let me know. What I fear is that he got hit by a lorry ke, in a ditch somewhere waiting to be found. I am writing almost with tears all the time. Partly because I am frustrated there wasn't much time for me in Malaysia, to do anything. Police report has been filed and my other brother has written in the Star.
Now this waiting game is making me very apprehensive.Usually he'll find means to go back to Kuala Kangsar. 2 kali he was found in MCKK in the past. His memory seemed to have stopped at that point in hislife. Allah sahajalah yang tahu why he is tested this far. To him he is still 17.
Doakan so he's looked after by people yang he come across, who would find sympathy in them to give him food and a place to shut his eyes. Insy. Amiin. And I am sorry if anybody finds this upsetting.

Love, Najmiah

Dr. Najmiah K Ahmad
Clinical Fellow in Anaesthetics
York District General.

Second message:

I go through a cycle of optimism and pessimism. Looking at how he was found last time after 4 days missing , by the roadside, cengkung and dishevelled, makan tak minum tak tidur tak, I just hope he's still alive.On the cause of his illness, I am not the best to outline the cause, but what i know is always complained about being bullied in MCKK. To what extent we didn't know because at the time it's our fault we thought he was'just saying it'.So nobody paid attention to his complaints.
After getting some prize money for his 8As PMR from a Japanese Minister he ran away from school but not to home, but to KL. When we found him he said he couldn't stand school. Nak balik rumah takut my dad marah. My dad took him out of school and he went to a school in Kelantan. Towards his SPM he was getting worse but managed 2A1 - Physics and Add Maths.
Already on tablet he joined the flying school, he was always fascinated by airplanes, always wanted to be a pilot. Half a year he was there (Kedah I think) they found his tablets and he was expelled. He took a turn for the worse.When he got slightly better I got him enrolled in a private college. He received a best student award when he was on this medication tradename Domatil. Somehow the tablet was stopped ( pricey I think) and he was on Risperidone ( for those medics who are interested) , he is never stable since and he couldn't sit his exams.
To what extent was he bullied? Was it very bad that he couldn't tell anyone? Sexually? Or was he already 'crazy' so people bullied him? Chicken ke egg ke. I reserve my comments for now on boarding schools.
May he returns safe.
Amiin.

Wallahualam.. I do hope somebody can offer some help.And if there's any MCKK OBs reading this, I also hope that you can spread this news.He was an Old Boy regardless he was only there until form 3.
Wassalam~

Sigh~

Assalamualaykum..

I think my life is so disorganized right now.
I've got a pile of work that needs to be done a.s.a.p.
Reports, worksheets, timetables..
And worse, tomorrow we're having a meeting with the parents regarding the exam results [which by the way can't be proud of at all!]
I can't see the importance of having this kind of meeting when most of the parents don't really care whether their children come to school or not.
Shheeeeesh!! Blame my BAD time management for this!
I tend to do work at the last minutes or close to deadlines.
[my 'motto': "I WORK BEST UNDER PRESSURE"]
Yeah, righttt!! Hehehehehe..

And there's this problem with my house mate.
I think she's just been swindled by her boyfriend [who used to be our school Pak Guard -not that it matters.. LOL]
Actually I'm in a dilemma right now.. whether to tell her family or just keep my mouth shut.
Maybe I should mind my own 'unfinished' business, but then I can't stop thinking how big of a fool she has been since they became a couple.

Let's analyze her situation:

She broke her engagement with her fiance (read here) a few months back and almost right after that the Pak Guard [PG] came into the picture.
He 'took her heart away' lah konon-kononnya.
I don't have any problem with what he does for a living, so long as it's HALAL, then again his stories or shall I say 'tales' to my house mate Y were so stupidly unbelievable.
What sort of stories? Here are some, have fun laughing your heads off!
Mind you guys these were what he told Y on their first so-called date:-

-PG told Y that when he was working in KL he used to drive [by that he meant used to have..] all sorts of cars Perdana V6 lah, Honda lah.. I wonder why he only drives a second hand Wira when he decided to come back to his kampung.

-PG said he used to be an assistant architect. [Wow!] And he was the one who designed the PM's house [wow! wow! and WOWW!!]. Upon hearing this from Y, I started to feel very uneasy with this PG guy. That is sooooooo stupid, don't you think? If you're that successful then why on earth did you have to come work in a kampung as a guard? You can do that in KL lah if you want! Aiyoo!

-PG also said he had 20-30k in his savings and that he needn't any loan to make a house for his parents. I don't see any relevance in telling anyone how much [or little] I have in my savings. And during the first meeting some more! That's just simply ridiculous.

-PG received an offer from PDRM,but he was not interested to join the force. Then, he got an offer from MAS [to receive trainings for pilot] but he declined. He said he's not so keen in working under somebody's order. According to him, he's his own boss. Yikes! What sort of a lie was that? If you 'really' got an offer from PDRM/MAS, you must've applied for the post lah kan in the first place? They aren't that stupid to offer you a job just like that! And Y actually believed this!

+ + +

There are more, but I don't want to waste more of my time just to write about PG.
The most important thing is what Y is doing now.

SHE'S APPLYING FOR A LOAN TO BUY SOME PROPERTY FOR 100K!!

And so much to my own 'bewilderment', she's going to share the property with PG.
Ha ha ha. That's just plain idiot, kan?
And she said PG's going to apply a loan for the other half of it [which I doubt it'll be granted because he's jobless now. yupp, he quit his job as our school guard.]
I pity Y, because it's only her second year working yet she's already thinking of getting such a huge loan. And not for herself, even..
That PG guys is obviously a CON, right?
And either Y is totally in love to believe such words from PG or she's stupid, period.
Another take is that perhaps she's been bewitched by a 'love/money' spell?

Please, tell me what you think.
Or better still, tell me what do you think I have to do to help Y.

Oh, and did I tell you last week she didn't come home for a night and she told me she had a stomach ache and had to stay at her parents'?
It's no surprise to know that I've been conned too, by Miss Y herself.
It turns out she was in Kuala Terengganu with PG until very late that night and was afraid to go home at that hour.
So they took turns to sleep in her car.
La la la... can you believe that???

Love is after all,.... BLIND!

Wassalam~

Reminiscing~

Assalamualaykum.

It's official.
It's finally been decided.
(read here.)
The place where I grew up and met friends who I can call family will finally be relocated to another location.
When I read that in Asni's blog yesterday, I felt as if I was being stabbed straight into my heart.
Some may think that I over-reacted given the fact that I somehow already knew this was coming sooner or later, but when it's officially announced, I almost cried.

TKC is not only a school for me [and each of us TKCians], but it's also a place where we learn all about life, love and most importantly friendship.
As I always say, the five years spent in Bukit Merbah was the best years in my life and nothing can take away the fond memories [and also bitter ones] I had there.
The college spirit may always be with us no matter we go, but it's not the same.
I just can't imagine if we're having our 10th year gathering [for example] at another place, not in our old school compound.
The feeling must be totally different.


But who am I to say what to do and vice versa.
I'm just a plain TKC Old Girl with our college spirit that'll stay with me till the day I die.
I'll be damned if they make our old school compound as another school.
[Like what happened to SAS and SDAR..]
Huhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhu...
Then again., this is just another rambling from me..~

Wassalam.

♥ is ♥

Assalamualaykum.

♥ ♥ ♥

Ada Cinta - Acha Septriasa & Irwansyah

Ucapkanlah kasih..
Satu kata yang kunantikan
Sebab ku tak mampu membaca matamu
Mendengar bisikmu

Nyanyikanlah kasih..
Senandung kata hatimu
Sebab ku tak sanggup mengartikan getar ini
Sebab ku meragu pada dirimu

Mengapa berat ungkapkan cinta
Padahal ia ada
Dalam rinai hujan, dalam terang bulan
Juga dalam sedu sedan

Mengapa sulit mengaku cinta
Padahal yang terasa
Dalam rindu dendam, hening malam
Cinta.. terasa ada…

♥ ♥ ♥

Am feeling a bit down today because I've been listening to this song non-stop since morning.
To tell you the truth, I'm not a big fan of the movie "My Heart" starring Acha Septriasa and Irwansyah.
[It was a complete turn off pour moi, I didn't even try to watch the film.]
I like the OST, but not the way they acted in that movie.
Irwansyah for me, seemed so "lembik" in it. [pardon me if that's harsh for any Irwan's fans out there].

But the upcoming movie "Love is Cinta" is very intriguing for me.
Then again it's not because of the two lovebirds [Acha+Irwan] but I'm looking forward to watch the co-actor Raffi Ahmad in action.
Seeing the film's TMO [the making of] and watching Raffi's character, touched my heart.
The theme of this new movie is for me a bit more interesting than the previous "My Heart".
Not only it's a tiny little bit more serious, but the theme is so close to me.
Well, it's a story about an unrequited love.
How familiar is that to yours truly?
That's like a synonym to me!
:((

Wassalam~

p/s: Achik sila beli speaker or bergegas ke CC sekarang. LOL

ANGRY!!!

Assalamualaykum.
Before I go on with today's entry, let me tell you one thing.
Yes, I'm so angry today.
I'm really furious after reading Pa'chik's blog.
No, please don't get me wrong.
I'm not mad at him, I'm furious after reading the article he pasted in his latest entry.

How low can we go as a Malaysian Muslim?
Just to prove that we are living in a so-called developed country, to prove that we are open-minded, to show the world that we are capable of doing everything.. we have to put Islam away?
MasyaAllah.. I think having one 'Lina Joy' is enough.

Read this:

* * * * *

Bartenders Whip Up A Storm At Contest

By JADE CHAN
Photos by RICKY LAI

Third placed: Erik whipping up his Belveryna and Eredevleb Framboise Tea Martini cocktails.

THEY shook, stirred and dazzled the crowd as they whipped up two cocktails – a martini and a long drink – within a few minutes at the Belvedere Bartender Competition.

The competition hosted by Belvedere Vodka at Frangipani bar offered an opportunity to celebrate the skill, creativity and artistry of Malaysia’s bartenders as well as Belvedere Vodka’s belief in the art of mixing the perfect cocktail.

Ten bartenders from various five-star hotels and night outlets competed for the title of Belvedere Bartender of the Year 2007 (Malaysia).

The winner will participate in the Regional Bartender Event in Hong Kong with an opportunity to go on to the Belvedere International Bartender Competition in London.

“Each cocktail must feature one of the three types of Belvedere Vodka – Belvedere Pure, Belvedere Cytrus or Belvedere Pomarancza,” said Riche Monde Malaysia Belvedere Vodka brand manager Jeff Chong, whose company distributes the brand in Malaysia.

“Judging will be based on taste, outlook (bartender’s presentation), presentation of drink, aroma and the name of the cocktail.”

Test of skill and creativity: Adzhar straining his cocktail mixture before pouring it into a martini glass.

The panel of judges comprised Moet Hennessy Spirits marketing manager Andrew Khan, Belvedere Vodka regional brand ambassador Sam Jeveons and Klue magazine managing director John Lim.

“We’re also hosting a cocktail party, which will offer guests and Belvedere lovers the chance to have fun and enjoy some drinks,” Chong said.

Riche Monde Malaysia’s corporate clients, media members and celebrities like Marion Caunter, Wong Sze Zen, Stephanie Chai and Will Quah attended the invitation-only event.

Daphne Iking hosted the event while Camelia entertained guests with a few songs.

“Belvedere literally means 'beautiful to see.' A fitting name for such an alluring vodka,” Iking said during the opening of the event.

Delectable: Alvey sampling Adzhar’s Smooth while Iking looks on.

“The moniker is in fact inspired by the historical Belvedere Palace in Warsaw, former home to Polish royalties and presidents. Continuing a Polish tradition reaching back 600 years, Belvedere Vodka is handcrafted in small batches using centuries-old techniques to ensure the highest quality, “ she said.

Mohd Adzhar Ahmad, who has been bartending at Qba in The Westin Kuala Lumpur for two years, was declared the competition’s winner with his long drink named Pomarancza Ozie and martini called Smooth.

Fellow Qba bartender Rizal Junior Johari won second place with his Capito long drink and June’s martini.

Mohd Erik Fiza Zulkifle from The Loft KL was third with his Belveryna and Eredevleb Framboise Tea Martini cocktails.

Vodka fan James Coathup tried Erik’s Belveryna and described it as “fresh, fruity and delicious”.

“This drink is something I’d actually buy. I usually go for drinks like vodka cranberry and vodka lime soda when I’m out for drinks with friends,” the Australian said.

Channel [V] VJ Alvin Pulga, better known as Alvey sampled Adzhar’s Smooth and declared that its smooth taste lived up to its name.

* * * * *

"BRAVO"!!!!!
The 1st,2nd and 3rd place are all Muslim.
Good job, guys. 'Well done!'

Astaghfirullahalazim.
Don't they have better things to do?
Is getting a job that hard they had to settle being a bartender instead?
Come on, is not like you're making 'teh tarik' or what ok?
MasyaAllah.. MasyaAllah..

If any of you readers think that they aren't doing any wrong, or perhaps you're trying to be positive, thinking that they might just mingle with vodka,beer,wine et cetera without consuming it, [which I doubt because how would they know the mixture tastes good if they don't try it first??] ,well I hope this hadith will make you think twice.
Credits to pa'chik for putting this up, so that I can share with all of you who are reading.

Diriwayatkan oleh Ibnu Tarmizi dan Ibnu Majah;
“Rasulullah s.a.w. melaknat tentang arak, sepuluh golongan: (1) yang memerasnya, (2) yang minta diperaskannya, (3) yang meminumnya, (4) yang membawanya, (5) yang minta dihantarinya, (6) yang menuangkannya, (7) yang menjualnya, (8) yang makan harganya, (9) yang membelinya, (10) yang minta dibelikannya.”

I have yet to give my opinion on a local female actor who decided to shaved her head bald and now this??
MasyaAllah, it's neverending.
People seem proud to show they did something that is obviously wrong in Islam.
I really can't understand this.

I'm sorry this entry sounds so negative , but this I had to do.
I'm tired of reading about what these kind of people did to make others [non-Muslim] even more confused about Islam.
I may not be the best or the most suitable person to write about this, as I know I'm not a perfect Muslimah too, but Subhananallah..
This is just way too much.
I might just punch them in the face if I ever see them on the street.
LOL.

Oh well, for the record, shaving your head bald [for woman] is HARAM no matter how you put it [unless it's for medical purposes-lah..].
What does art got to do with hukum Islam anyway?
It doesn't make it HALAL, even though that's what you do for a living.
[And daddy showing his support by shaving his head too?? Come on!!!!!]
The same goes for men who wear earrings or chain/choker.
That's HARAM too. Period.

Wassalam.

Melancholy~

Assalamualaykum..
This post is dedicated to YOURS TRULY and a friend who [indirectly] introduced this song to me.
[I think you know who you are..I downloaded this song from your previous site.]
The song, "Tearjerker" is from a pop punk band, Fenix TX.
Please don't ask me who are they, because I also don't have a clue! =D
This song is the ONLY one from this band that I know and listen to.
Cherish the lyrics..

"Tearjerker" - Fenix TX

Picture's on the wall
Just waiting there to fall
Still remind me
That painful holiday
Can almost hear you say
Please don't miss me
Too long...

What did I do wrong
Could've sung a different song
You were my tune
Make my heart believe
A want is not a need
And I'm all right without you
The days go by
The nights don't change
The stars still spell out your name
I will wait for you..!!

The world has let me down
Is it you're just not around
I've lost my reason
All the memories
Every smile you gave to me
You can keep them
The days go by
The nights don't change
The stars still spell out your name

I will wait for you
I will wait for you
I will wait for you
I will wait for you

I will wait for days go by
And still I will wait for you

+++++++++++++++++++++

It makes me think of a very special person.
Whom I wish not to be reminded ever again.
But seeing his name in a friend's blog, makes my heart skipped a beat.
Knowing that he's doing alright with his life now.
And it hurts, thinking that we are not as close as we used to.
Damn I hate this feeling!
[Soooo "high school"...said Sereh.. =D]

Well, people..this is just my personal ramblings.
Suddenly I felt like sharing my melancholy mood today.
Hopefully it doesn't effect your mood..

Wassalam..

p/s : eD, I reduced the file size..hope they are not as irritating as before.. I kinda like my Sbox lah.. hehehe

Sorry, YOU'RE SO STUPID!!!!

Assalamualaykum..
First of all, I'd like to apologize for the unmannerly title.
But after reading yesterday's newspaper I was furious.
I was so angry, and at the same time felt so annoyed.
Read this:

Mana perginya tudung Salima?

Oleh: NIEZAM ABDULLAH

Apa sudah jadi dengan bekas pelajar Akademi Fantasia Keempat (AF4) iaitu Salima? Sebelum ini dia begitu mempertahankan pendirian untuk tidak membuka tudung apatah lagi mendedahkan rambutnya kepada umum.

Sehinggakan gadis berusia 19 tahun ini turut kesal apabila pihak Astro menerusi program Fail Sulit AF telah menyiarkan gambar-gambarnya yang tidak bertudung ketika terlantar sakit selepas terlibat dengan kemalangan jalan raya di Temerloh tidak lama dulu.

Kata Salima ketika itu, dia kesal apabila pihak Astro menayangkan gambar-gambar tersebut sedangkan dia telah melarangnya sejak awal lagi.

Jika dilihat daripada kenyataan itu, ia memperlihatkan Salima begitu mempertahankan soal rambut atau auratnya.

Beliau menganggap perkara itu adalah maruah diri dan penyiaran beberapa keping gambar di dalam program berkenaan ternyata mencabuli haknya sebagai gadis bertudung.

Bagaimanapun semasa pementasan teater Rangkas Putera di Auditorium Muzium Sultan Alam Shah, Shah Alam pada 13 hingga 15 April lalu, ramai yang terkejut melihat penampilan terbaru Salima.

Gadis itu muncul dalam teater purbawara arahan Azmi Zainun tanpa memakai tudung dengan memegang watak Permaisuri Tanjung Karang.

Teater itu mengisahkan seorang bayi yang ditemui di sebuah rumpun buluh oleh sebuah keluarga diraja lalu dibesarkan dalam kehidupan istana.

Bayi yang diberi nama Rangkas Putera itu tidak membesar sebagaimana diharapkan sebaliknya telah mengganas dan merampas takhta keluarga angkatnya.

Tidak dinafikan persembahan Salima bersama Ifa Raziah dan Adlin (AF2) itu benar-benar memperlihatkan bakatnya dalam bidang teater. Tetapi persoalannya di manakah tudung Salima? Adakah kerana ingin memenuhi impian berlakon teater tersebut memaksa dia mencabuli pendiriannya selama ini?

Menurut Salima, dia sendiri sudah mengagak kemunculannya itu akan menimbulkan kontroversi terutamanya soal pemakaian tudung. Gadis bernama Nor Salima Habibi ini sebenarnya sudah bersiap sedia terhadap jawapan bagi persoalan yang bakal dibangkitkan itu.

Katanya, apa yang dilihat oleh penonton itu sekadar rambut palsu. Pada dasarnya Salima tidak menanggalkan tudung jauh sekali dengan sesuka hati ingin mempertontonkan rambutnya kepada umum.

Sebaliknya sebelum rambut palsu disarungkan di kepalanya, dia terlebih dahulu memakai anak tudung yang menutupi keseluruhan rambut asalnya.

Dia juga menganggap, tindakannya itu tidak salah dan bersedia berhadapan dengan apa juga persoalan yang akan dibangkitkan selepas ini.

‘‘Saya berpendapat dengan cara itu saya masih lagi tidak mendedahkan rambut saya kepada orang ramai. Saya masih menutup aurat kerana rambut asal ditutupi dengan anak tudung sebelum saya dipakaikan dengan rambut palsu,’’ katanya. [soooooooo stupid!!!]

Menurut Salima, dia mendapat tawaran berlakon teater tersebut selepas diajak oleh Ifa Raziah beberapa bulan lalu.

Secara kebetulan Salima diminta untuk menggantikan watak orang lain yang tidak dapat turut serta di dalam pementasan berkenaan.

Bagaimanapun selepas perbincangan dengan pengarah teater itu, Salima bersetuju untuk memakai anak tudung bagi menghormati skrip teater tersebut.

Benar kata Salima itu tetapi cara tersebut hanya menutupi rambut sebaliknya bagaimana dengan bahagian telinga, leher dan dada yang masih terdedah?

Ini kerana imej beliau selama ini menutupi keseluruhan bahagian tersebut. Bagaimanapun Salima tetap mempertahankan pendiriannya untuk muncul di pentas teater itu.

‘‘Saya anggap tindakan saya itu tidak salah kerana masih menutupi rambut asal,’’ katanya. Gadis ini juga menolak langkah yang diambilnya itu semata-mata untuk meraih publisiti murahan. [yeahh, right...]

Sebaliknya dia menganggap kemunculannya itu adalah untuk mempelbagaikan bakatnya dalam bidang seni.

‘‘Saya tak mahu berterusan menjadi penyanyi sebaliknya saya ingin mencuba bidang lain khususnya teater kerana minat saya dalam bidang tersebut bermula sejak di bangku sekolah lagi,’’ jelasnya.

+++++++++++++++++++++++

Masya Allah... after reading this, tak putus² beristighfar.
How could she say that?
From what I understand, in her own point of view, using wig is OKAY.
It means you're covering your hair, the same like wearing a hijab/tudung.
Astaghfirullahalazim..

If that's the case, she should've worn the wig since the first day she decided to cover her hair.
That would've been easier and will definitely cause less confusion for those who decided to do the same.
Some people could've misunderstood the meaning of 'aurat' in Islam.
Masya Allah....
For me, if you want to wear a hijab, wear it nicely and with manner.

This is another example.
An example of those who think that tudung is simply a 'fashion'.
Astaghfirullahalazim...

Well, before I go off, again I want to apologize if this entry causes uneasiness to anyone.
I know this kind of 'sensitive issue' should be referred to an expert.
But comparing wigs to hijab is just too much for me.
It can simply means those 'Drag Queens' are wearing tudung lah all this while.
Sigh~

My goodness, Salima.. you're so STUPID!
Think before you say something.
Or better yet, don't think at all and just shut up.

Wassalam~